Managing expectations—is this a thing? I laugh sardonically (or maybe maniacally) even as I write the title. Writers, by definition, are dreamers. We’re creative and our imaginations are dynamic, and naturally, this extends beyond storytelling. We see bestselling books and movie deals and plastic dolls for sale, fashioned in our character’s likeness. We dream of book awards and a place at the altar of literary greatness. Dreams are important. They push us to try new ways to tell a story, again and again, and most important of all, they push us to do our best.
The only problem is, they can also be paralyzing when they fail to materialize and cause crippling self-doubt. At times, we need to be grounded, come down from the castles in the sky, sit ourselves down and have a frank discussion about not only managing our expectations, but about how to avoid the wretched self-doubt that rears its ugly head when these dreams don’t go according to plan. Along the way, I’ve found myself in this position at times, and have come to understand a few grounded truths to live by:
My WIP isn’t a failure just because something “went wrong”.
I’ve talked a little about this before, but I had a lot of visions for the book I just finished. At first, I wanted the dual-POV narrative to be framed by interviews of many different characters (sort of in the way Leann Moriarty does in Big Little Lies), but no matter what I did, I couldn’t make them work with the body of the story without having to completely change one of my main characters. And my characters were fixed points in my mind—the driving force of the story as a whole. The next “failed attempt” was to bring a framing device of a present-day person who is related to one of my protagonists from the past. Not only did this end up feeling trite, it over-complicated an already complex story, and the book suffered greatly because of it. I berated myself for a time because I really wanted to include an interesting framing device for this book, but it didn’t, in fact, work. Until it did. I finally stumbled across a series of newspaper articles that not only changed the direction of my story, but made perfect sense as a framing device that also added a nice bit of tension.
Did I fail? Yes, a few times, but is the book a bust? Absolutely not. It did eventually find its way, even if I couldn’t lead it in the direction I envisioned.
My work-in-progress doesn’t have to be the pen ultimate of my entire body of work. Neither does it need to contain everything I’ve ever wanted to say about life and death and religion and politics and living day-by-day on the planet earth. You see what I’m saying? I think sometimes, we place immense pressure on ourselves to make our current WIP a shining, pen ultimate piece, so that it feels like we’ve created something worthy of praise, or better yet, that we’ve created something brilliant.
While brilliance may be a good thing to strive for, it’s important to remember these three points: 1.) Brilliance is relative. What you think is brilliant comedic writing may be someone else’s “meh,” so there’s no need to hold yourself to an exhausting standard that is very much a moving target; 2.) Brilliance is really about executing the best book you can for THIS particular story you need to tell. Executing it well doesn’t have to involve innovative methodologies or complicated literary structures that may, ultimately, freeze you in your tracks and make the drafting process agonizing; and 3.) The most important thing to remember is that you’re writing for readers. Placing so much pressure on ourselves to create something “brilliant”, can often prohibit a reader from connecting emotionally to the emotional journey of the characters.
A way to confront the issue of “this book has to be everything!” is to keep a folder with a list of your other ideas. It releases some of the pressure, knowing you have some great work ahead of you. (And who knows, perhaps with one of those in the future, you may even get to use one of those complex literary devices or new points of view you’re itching to try.)
My WIP isn’t the last thing I’ll ever write (probably).
As writers, aka lovers of story, we can be a little melodramatic about the importance of our art. Of course it matters, and it’s important for so many reasons, but it’s also not a life-or-death situation should the piece you’re writing not be everything you dreamed it would be. We finish the work to the best of our abilities and we move on. If you’re a writer, you will write something else. This means you’ll have other opportunities to take a crack at all of those dreams.
I’ve been finding, of late, that managing expectations is one of the most important keys to success. It keeps us from spiraling into an abyss of worries and fears, and it helps us from becoming paralyzed; unable to move forward in a book that will have its own true merit, even if it doesn’t look exactly as we expected. Frankly, I haven’t written a book yet, that came out exactly as I’d envisioned it to be. They still have plenty of merit, and in fact, I’ve managed to do things in my body of work that I didn’t expect! So. Manage your expectations and don’t be too hard on yourself. And most important of all, take the time to enjoy the process of puzzling together a novel—a truly challenging, wonderful, admirable feat.
What do you consider a “failure” when working on a story? How do you help manage your expectations as you navigate the drafting and editing phases?
About Heather Webb
Heather Webb is the USA Today bestselling and award-winning author of historical fiction. To date, Heather’s books have sold in over a dozen countries worldwide. As a freelance editor, Heather has helped many writers sign with agents and go on to sell at market. When not writing, she feeds her cookbook addiction, geeks out on history and pop culture, and looks for excuses to head to the other side of the world.
I loved every word of this, Heather. Truth in every line.
Most of my failures are in writing proposals, not novels, because once I sink my teeth in, you can’t rip it away or convince me to drop it.
My first, trial novel had a fatal flaw because I didn’t know any better—but people love the premise and I love the characters, and if I one day think of a fix, I just might go back to it!
Proposals are tricky, aren’t they? We’re not completely vested. We’re testing the waters, looking for a story, seeking the passionate response we know we need to fuel us through months and years of drafts and revisions.
I loved your first book, Kathryn, and I can’t wait to see what you have next on the horizon…<3 Thanks for your comments today.
Thank you for this. I’ve been through all of this, as I sit here waiting for proofs of my novel. The one about this WIP must be everything rings especially loud. I wrote so many scenes to add some extra truth and then had to take them out because it wasn’t right for the story.
For me, the main point that would make a book a failure is if it’s too confusing. This is why betareaders are so valuable.
I can’t agree more. I don’t know where my books would be without my beloved critique partners and beta readers!
I, like Kathryn, loved every word of this. It’s great timing for me to read it as I am currently on a now-personal writing retreat (I think you may know where) and it’s tempting to put a lot of pressure on myself to get a certain amount of work done. I’m spending so much money on this trip! I’m away from my family! Every second must count! But I need to manage my expectations, release the pressure valve, and go with the flow, spending lots of time working, yes, but also reveling in being ALONE after months and months of having everyone in the house nearly all the time.
And now, I’m off to get some breakfast and start my writing day. :)
Thanks, Erin. I know EXACTLY how that goes! But as you said, just being alone and reveling in a different location outside of your four walls where you’ve spent the majority of the last six months is a huge stimulant to your creativity, I’m sure! And necessary. Enjoy!!! (and have a margarita for me. :) )
What I needed to hear, right when I needed to hear it. Thanks, Heather!
Thanks for dropping in. xxx
“…there’s no need to hold yourself to an exhausting standard that is very much a moving target.” This hits home for me as I move forward (slowly) in a line edit in which I keep being tempted to go after that moving target. For me, managing expectations has a lot to do with learning as much as I can about my craft and the publishing industry. Much of that, I learn right here.
Yes! Learning all aspects of working in publishing–craft, marketing, publicity, and editorial–are so helpful in knowing where to spend our time and energy. Bottom line? 95% of it should be on the writing! Thanks for your comments, as always, Susan
Hi, Heather:
A timely piece, I’m sure, for a great many of us. It’s not always the WIP alone that inspires so much second-guessing, but sometimes by staying focused on it amongst the rest of the turmoil we can ground ourselves in what we can control–our thoughts, our intentions, our words.
I loved your comment about no work turns out the way we envisioned it. In a sense, every work remains unfinished, incomplete, “less than.” It takes a little hard-earned wisdom to accept that finishing something is far more important than getting it perfect, writing is rewriting (to a point–enter deadline), and part of the process includes forgiving oneself for not being an utter genius, and using whatever sense of letdown we might feel energize the work on the next book.
Thanks for the sense of kindness and care. I think we all need some of that right now.
David, I will now forgive myself for not being an utter genius. Thanks for that mantra.
Thanks, David. You’re so right about using our manuscripts to ground us as the world is in a state of turmoil. I wasn’t able to write at all for about six weeks this spring, and it was even longer before I could read again. But eventually, I found solace in the words as I always seem to do, and solace in “living” in a different world for awhile.
I think the letdown after finishing a book and seeing where it does (and doesn’t) go is also part of managing our expectations, isn’t it. Actually, I feel another post brewing….
Thanks for your insightful comments today.
Loved this, Heather.
Reminds me of a saying I adore. “Failure is NOT a bad word.”
Hugs
Dee
I love this saying, too. I need to write it on my forehead with permanent marker!
“Pen ultimate” vs “penultimate”? Heather, I don’t know if that’s a typo, but it’s pure genius.
I have a stack of cue cards I revisit when I’m feeling daunted and disappointed in my progress. They have nearly every point you’ve clearly articulated here, albeit in different words. Hard-won wisdom, amirite?
Also, reportedly AA has a saying I glommed onto years ago. “Expectations are just resentments under construction.” I try to remember that whenever I’m tempted to feel sorry for myself.
Ha ha! Thanks, Jan. It was purposeful. :)
I love this cue card idea! I might have to try it. You know what I did do a few years ago? I was the Twitter person at the WU Un-con and I saved several of the notecards and stashed them in my purse and wallet. Every single time I saw them, I remembered the con, my friends there and the feeling of support, and I felt like I could breathe through whatever shit day I was having.
Now, this AA saying is so dead-on. It has me thinking this morning.
Thanks for stopping by today!
Heather, your article immediately reminded me of when I was on my college’s newspaper, when because I used to lard on the language with a trowel, my editor use to caution me about overwriting my pieces.
Finally, I wrote an article on the housing situation in our county that I thought was exceedingly clever, only to see when it was published that he’d titled it, “A Lot of Big Words About Housing.”
Trying to be lofty-language brilliant puts too much engine on a grocery cart: damn thing’s careening about and can’t make any tight turns. I’ve written several books, and they have done some things well and other things not; I did the best I could at the time.
Thanks for the reminder that when you look back on your work, look with proportion. And move forward from there. Thanks!
Tom, I love that metaphor: too much engine ion a grocery cart! I had trouble with purple prose myself when I began. Eventually I learned that less is more, but it took some pretty direct counts from beta readers and some articles about it to understand what it was really about. We live and learn!
Thanks for your comments today.
Thanks for the post Heather. It is well timed from my perspective. I just started my second novel – it’s an absolutely brilliant idea :) Two chapters in I’m like, “This is crap! I don’t feel the characters, the suspense is written yet not engaging.” Yes, a failure.
You’re article reminds me of the agile development process my teams use in software development. Fail fast, learn, move on.
You helped me remember that my first novel was filled with failure. I wrote about 250,000 words. The final 80,000 in the published work are apparently pretty good :)
With lessons learned I’m hoping for 150,000 words to produce 100,000 someone else might actually read.
Fail fast, move on. I love that.
You’ve got this, Robert! And there will be more lessons for ypu as you work on your second book. I’m working on book eight and still learning on the regular! I think I need to adopt your tech phrase: Fail fast, learn, move on! It’s just about right.
Thanks for your comments today.
Great piece, Heather, and it will make me get back to my work. We have just completed a major move and I am using every excuse I can find to not get back to my work. But I must. The best thing–when I reread, my eyes will be clearer and maybe a road to completion will be mine. I know this novel does not have to be everything, but damn–it has to be something.
Good luck, Beth!
You know, it’s hard to motivate ourselves to wade back in but the clarity, as you said, is worth its weight in gold! I find issues really stick out when I’ve had a little distance. :)
Really appreciate this piece, Heather. I’m taking a break from copyedits for my April release, and realizing how relieved I am to see that the book may be better than I’d thought — because my assessment of it had been so weighted down by what it isn’t.
Like Kathryn, I’m aware of the “failures” in my proposals — all those lovely ideas, so well put together, so captivating! Falling flat on potential editors’ screens. And yet, each one spurs me to the next stage. In fact, my WIPs reflect the importance of not holding on to expectations too tightly. I’m rewriting one synopsis my agent didn’t think would sell into a novella, with characters from an earlier series. And the April book (Bitterroot Lake, written as Alicia Beckman) came about after we pitched a traditional mystery series; an editor saw the potential differently, and we ended up selling it to her as a stand-alone suspense novel.
And I LOVE “pen ultimate.” Thank you for a delightful new phrase!
Congratulations on your sale! This sort of flexibility and fluidity with our manuscripts is paramount and you’ve illustrated that so perfectly here. Good luck with your release!
So much wisdom in this essay and the comments. Pen ultimate was great!
Erin, I hope you have a fantastic writing retreat.
David, it’s so freeing knowing we don’t have to be geniuses. Funny how the joy returns when we give up perfectionism.
I really love the comments at WU as much as the posts! So many great minds coming together…happy writing!
First of all, thank you for writing this! I needed to hear it more than you can imagine.
I struggle with feeling like a failure when I receive developmental edits from my publisher. If they are extensive, it makes me spiril into negative self-talk and ridiculous assumptions about my abilities.
Usually, after a few days of too much sugar and not enough wine, I crawl out of my hole of misery and get back to work. But I hate that initial gut-punch reaction!
Lorie, love seeing your comments here!
I know what you mean about the dev edits for sure. Even when I get a pile of suggestions from my crit partners, I have that initial reaction because I see SO MUCH WORK ahead of me and just groan and think I’ll never pull it off. Meanwhile, I’ve read your work and you’ve got the chops, friend. Write on!
X