I have this GREAT story I want to tell you about, and … Oh darn. Can you hold on for a second?
Okay, I’m back. Where were we? Right. This GREAT story. It has this amazing plot and you won’t believe… whoops. Sorry. Gotta go again. I’ll be right back.
Here I am. Sorry about that. I’ve got this friend. You probably know her. She’s great — always around when I want to talk, the first to tell me interesting news, and when I need a laugh or advice, she’s right there. But between you and me, the problem is, hanging with her makes it almost impossible to get anything else done. Like writing. Or concentrating. So, what were we talking about again?
Does this sound familiar to you? If you replace the word ‘friend’ with ‘Facebook’ or ‘the Internet’ I’ll bet the answer is yes.
A few weeks ago I was trying to write. My email program kept dinging, reminding me I had new mail; I could hear Facebook burbling away on the posts I had followed; and one of my favorite authors had a new blog post up I couldn’t wait to read (so I did).
Shortly thereafter I realized that if the Internet took human form, I could arrest it for stalking.
Seriously. Most of us wouldn’t tolerate this type of interruption from real people — if a friend did this, calling us every fifteen minutes, constantly stopping by during time we’d set aside to work, we’d pull the plug on that relationship. But we’ll allow ourselves to be derailed by cute pet pictures, celebrity wedding photos, and memes telling us how important it is to stay focused.
Why?
[pullquote]I realized that if the Internet took human form, I could arrest it for stalking.[/pullquote]
I think it is because writing is hard, and writers have always looked for an excuse to put off putting their butts in the chair. Before the Internet, the excuses weren’t nearly as much fun, or as easily accessible. Magazine or book reading eventually came to an end. Friends, desperate to get their own work done, hung up the phone. But with the Internet, the reading and chatting can go on forever, or at least as long as we have a connection.
So I’ve decided that it is time to set some boundaries on this relationship. Here’s what I’ve been doing:
Paying myself first. I’m working on my own fiction for at least an hour a day before I do anything else. (Sometimes I cheat and set the timer for 15 minutes before I start so I can scan headlines, email, and Facebook, but when that timer goes off I’m done. And it’s amazing how fast 15 minutes can go by.) Once my hour is up, I turn to my paying freelance work, which I HAVE to complete by a certain deadline, which keeps me motivated and productive.
Shutting off the Internet. While I’m in ‘writing’ mode, as opposed to ‘research’ mode, I turn off the wireless connection to my laptop. So far, I’ve relied on willpower to keep me from turning it back on, but if that fails, I’ve heard good things about the Freedom app Internet blocker.
Putting my laptop away when I’m done working. When I first started freelancing from home, I had one rule — no television on during the work day. I was afraid I’d get distracted and spend all my time watching Oprah instead of writing. Today, I’m trying to make my rule “No Internet browsing during work and no screens during family time.”
This last one is really hard — my family has all types of screens, and it’s so tempting to take five minutes and just check Facebook or scan email when we’re reading, playing games, or watching a movie. I’m not as good at putting my computer back in my office at the end of the day as I’d like to be, especially since checking in with my online friends is such an enjoyable and relaxing habit. But like any vice, it needs limits or it will take over. And I’m finding that by focussing on what’s in front of me in real life, instead of what’s on my screen, I can return to work refreshed and ready to write.
The downside to these new practices is that I’m not as active on some websites that are important to me. Some days I feel as if I’m missing out on all the fun, and I definitely miss connecting with my online writing friends. I’m still working to balance how to follow everyone’s blogs, posts, and comments with time to write and just be still and breathe.
The good news is that over the last month I’ve definitely become more productive and focused. I’m powering through my novel’s revisions, and I’m even finding I’m reading more books.
So — do you find the Internet to be your best friend or an intrusive stalker? If it’s the latter, how are you setting boundaries?
About Liz Michalski
Liz Michalski's (she/her) first novel, Evenfall, was published by Berkley Books (Penguin). Liz has been a reporter, an editor, and a freelance writer. In her previous life, she wrangled with ill-tempered horses and oversized show dogs. These days she's downsized to one husband, two children and a medium-sized mutt.
Liz–
You will forgive me for having skimmed your post, I have editing to do (just kidding, I read every word, almost).
Although you treat it in an amusing way, your topic is really important: fragmented attention. People now claim to be writing novels on their smart phones. If so, what kinds of novels would they be? Nothing that requires much concentrated thought, which is what you’re talking about.
I’m glad the content on TV remains essentially mediocre. That means I don’t have to struggle not to watch. Same with the Internet. Excepting a very short list of really valuable sites–this one, for instance–I don’t need to bother with it.
It’s a kind of litmus test for writers in the current age: do you have a strong enough sense of mission and respect for craft to turn your back on all the social/techno/Internet Pied Pipers nudging and winking at you to give them your most precious possession, your time and attention?
Flip them the bird, and get back to work.
Liz–
Correction: When I recommend “flipping the bird” to distractions that threaten to keep the writer from writing, I’m not talking about friends and family. Virtually everyone I know understands when I don’t immediately answer an email or comment on a blog post for a day or two–that’s just Barry, they think. We’ll hear from him eventually.
And I fully understand the importance of the Internet for getting the word out about what we write. But there are a great many forces at work that are laying siege to The Castle of Creativity–and that’s where the bird comes in.
Hey Barry,
Family and friends definitely don’t get the bird, but I know what you mean. I’m trying hard to remember that for me, it’s family, health, and work, in that order. Almost anything else is a distraction. (Today work didn’t make the cut, as it was a snow day and we went sledding, but at least the first two got taken care of.)
There’s always such a pull toward the shiny and new, and the Internet is always offering up both, that it can definitely be hard for me to stay focused. Onward!
This is wonderful, Liz, and gave me my first laugh of the day, “Shortly thereafter I realized that if the Internet took human form, I could arrest it for stalking.”
When my son updated my laptop, those dings that notified me when I received email drove me crazy. Now the only ding I receive is when my best friend sends an email to a rarely used email address I still have and she’s an infrequent emailer.
I admire your discipline and your thoughtful approach. I get sucked in easily some days. Not when I’m at the office doing my other job. But this writing fiction from home (so far unpaid) is different.
Lately, my laptop has become dodgy (yes, I back my work) and now it only connects to the internet in my living room. I’ve developed a new habit of moving to a room with morning sun, no internet access, and writing on a makeshift standing desk (inspired by Keith Cronin’s Jan 5 blog). A win-win-win situation.
Lisa, I keep thinking I should dig out an old computer that can’t handle the Internet anymore — I’m pretty sure I have my very first Mac from 19996 boxed up in the basement. That would completely solve the problem for me, so long as I locked up the other laptops!
And I envy your standing desk — I need to look into that!
Just to let you know…my makeshift stand-up desk is an ironing board with a little old-fashioned footstool on top! Yes, crazy. Living in a small place on a budget and experimenting with this new habit, it’s helpful to be creative, make things do double duty, and not purchase any more furniture. Not at the present moment.
The first segment of your wonderful essay, about the friend, is spot on, Liz. I’ve been doing some powering-through myself. It’s funny, you do feel like you’re missing out, when you see a really cool and fun thread with all of your friends weighing in and cracking wise. But the good news is, we can still catch up. Unlike the phone (which used to be the bane of my existence) it’s all there for us to be checked and wise-cracked, and commented upon, in our own time.
And although I have noticed you aren’t “around” as much lately (and perhaps that’s because I haven’t been, either), I don’t feel as though we’ve lost touch with one another. It’s a pretty special thing. We just have to learn to be prudent with this special gift of connectivity.
Wonderful essay, Liz! Nice seeing you today! ;-)
Checking in at a later date, like the end of the day, is a good idea, Vaughn. It’s just that when I DO start checking, it always winds up being a big time suck for me. I guess I’ll have to use the timer at the end of the day, too!
And I’m glad you are getting some power revising done. (I’m also glad I’ve spent enough time online to become friends with you and the rest of the WU crew!)
Liz, there’s a time for everything. We have a family computer on which I read WU and the Blueboards and email. My laptop is for my work. It has internet too, but the separation helps in staying focused on work. My biggest problem is when I start a new project and I’m doing a lot of research … and I really, really procrastinate getting started, because there’s yet another interesting link to pursue.
Like you, family time is screen-free time, unless it’s a Fri or Sat. night movie night or Sun night football for my menfolk.
The idea of separating work and fun stuff onto two different computers is a good one, Vijaya. I’ll have to consider that — thanks for the idea.
Sigh. I needed this reminder. I battle the forces of distraction every day. Sometimes I win; more often the distractions win.
It’s been a lot harder since I got a smart phone. I’ve had to turn notifications off for EVERYTHING and I still turn it face down when I’m working.
I’m really bad about my phone, LJ — my kids go to two different schools and the oldest is about 40 minutes away from me, so especially in winter I keep it close to hand in case there’s a school closing, a call from the nurse, etc.. Definitely not a help for my writing!
This is something that’s been on my mind a LOT lately — in fact, I’m going to blog about this issue, with a different spin, for my next post here. Bottom line is we have to preserve our focus, and when we feel it slipping, we have to make changes. Thanks, Liz!
It seems like that sense of being fragmented is very much in our collective consciousness right now, Therese — I’m seeing it over and over again. Looking forward to your blog post — I’m sure I’ll learn something new!
“It seems like that sense of being fragmented is very much in our collective consciousness right now.”
For sure! And this was such a great post on it. Thanks for the reminder to shut out the noise and protect our creative space.
This: “A few weeks ago I was trying to write. My email program kept dinging, reminding me I had new mail; I could hear Facebook burbling away on the posts I had followed; and one of my favorite authors had a new blog post up I couldn’t wait to read (so I did).
Shortly thereafter I realized that if the Internet took human form, I could arrest it for stalking.”
Yep, this is a huge problem with me if I attempt to work at my actual desk. Seated there, in a common room in the middle of the house, all the dings and burbling aren’t even my only problem. I also have a “grumpy grandpa” of a dog who has it in his head that every bite of food must be preceded by being let outside. The back door is within sight of my desk. He’s a grazer, and so this means every twenty minutes or so he will go to the door and whine until let out. He doesn’t even pee while he’s out there – I’ve watched. He just walks the perimeter of the yard and wants back in!
He’ll go hours between his rounds if I’m NOT seated at my desk, and so I don’t sit there anymore, which means I either have to compose by hand (um, no) or on my laptop.
Speaking of this laptop, I made a couple of rules for myself when I bought it. One, no Outlook, which means it is not possible for me to check my e-mail without a hassle. If it isn’t made simple, I won’t do it. Two, no logging into social media sites from that computer. Ever. If I want to update my status or check in with my online friends, I need to get up out of my Morris chair (a production) or step off my treadmill desk (also a production) to do it. Yes, I am ultimately counting on my laziness to keep myself productive!
Of course, this only works if I have the willpower to keep my phone in the other room. I write freelance articles that require interviews, so that isn’t always possible, but I try!
I agree with Vaughn – it was nice seeing you today! Miss you, my friend!
Kim, your grumpy grandpa dog and my young whippersnapper could be from the same litter. If he’s not at the door to go out, he’s stealing socks or dropping his enormous Kong on my lap in an attempt to get me to play.
Your rules are all good ones — I’m getting so many helpful ideas in these comments! (And now I’m lusting after a treadmill desk — imagine how many steps I could get on my fitbit with one!)
I miss you too, my friend.
I needed to read this. i do get sucked in, much too often and then I beat myself up about it which is not conducive to getting good work done. I know exactly what you mean about feeling as if you are missing all the fun when not connected. However it is such a time suck.
Here’s the rub: we do need to promote our books via social media, right? It’s part of our world and it isn’t going away. And no one wants his or her book to go unnoticed.
So, yes. Rules. I’m going to get off the internet now.
Have a great writing day, all.
Kate,
I hope you got some quality writing done! Thanks for taking time to read. (And I honestly don’t know how well books sell on social media. I tend to buy new books because someone I trust recommends them, or because the back cover sounds interesting.)
Yep, I’ve been jumping down the Internet rabbit hole quite a bit lately. When you mentioned not watching TV during the day, it dawned on me that I’ve been able to set that limit on myself for my entire freelancing career. One of the few exceptions was when 9/11 happened. But I can’t seem to do the same with the Internet. Maybe it’s because it’s just a tab click away, while you’re staring at the screen, trying to think of what to write next. I know, I know, close the friggin’ tab. But it’s so easy to let the stalker in again. You know, he seemed so nice. And he likes me; he really likes me.
Our freelancing approach sounds similar, Densie — 9/11 was the only time I’ve turned the television on during the day as well. The proximity of the internet definitely is a factor for me — as well as the diversity of what I can read or view. It’s not just connecting with friends — it’s reading for research, reading for pleasure, as well as getting feedback on my own work.
“I realized that if the Internet took human form, I could arrest it for stalking.”
That brought home, as nothing has so far, that drifting on the Internet rivers of knowledge and entertainment is as much an obsessive behavior as stalking. And we allow it!
Yikes. Henceforth it will be treading the straight and narrow path between the enchantments of the Internet and the thorns of Luddism. Blinders on and full speed ahead.
“Henceforth it will be treading the straight and narrow path between the enchantments of the Internet and the thorns of Luddism.”
Beautifully put!
I think of Ernest Hemingway’s quote from an interview – “You can write any time people will leave you alone and not interrupt you. Or rather you can if you will be ruthless enough about it.”
Thank you for this wonderful reminder!
Thank you for reading, Janice!
Anyone else feel a soupçon of guilt when they reply to a well-deserved post on internet limits? ;)
I love the lesson in the laughter, Liz.
What I want someone to design is a mechanical timer for my internet connection that can cut me off in certain specified hours but be defeated, if necessary, by requiring me to leave my office. I have Freedom and StayFocusd but they all have easy work-arounds I can pursue from the comfort of my chair.
Jan, it would be awesome if they came up with technology that required me to log a certain number of words and/or walk a certain number of miles before activating my Internet connection! (With an emergency override, of course.) Now that’s technology I could get behind…
Wow! This post really speaks to me. The internet is definitely my enemy. I am constantly distracted by it. It’s the entire reason I don’t write daily. Well, not the entire – the other reason is time with family/friends/significant other. So then it amounts to…barely any time writing!
I have a writing group, but I usually scramble to write my piece for it last minute. It’s awful. I am an absolute hypocrite who dares to have a writing blog!
But your post has gotten to me. I think I’m going to have to try this freedom app and block my Internet. Or write in the morning, like you. Or, just go back to the good old-fashioned notebook!
Notebook don’t work for revising, though, only first drafts, in my experience. Darn!
Good luck, C.S.! Hope your new approach works.
Liz, we are all guilty of spending too much time on social media. I like your practice of getting your writing done before you allow yourself to go on social media. I’ve adopted that practice and it really works, though I don’t set a time limit. I write until I can’t focus or until I run out of steam, whichever comes first. Often I find it is a couple of hours before I finish. I am knee deep in revisions, which isn’t as much fun as writing, so the time drags. Best of luck on your latest writing project.
Revisions are so not fun. Good luck with them — I’ll be thinking of you as I work on my own.
Liz-
Augh! Turn off auto send/receive in your e-mail program! It’s evil. I turned that off years ago and have never looked back.
(Mountains of e-mail accumulate now, unfortunately, but at least I’m more productive.)
I went TV free in 2001. Sure, I missed “Breaking Bad”, too bad. I’ve read a lot more.
Maybe I’m lucky in that I just don’t find Facebook and Twitter as all consuming as others. When I return after a week (or sometimes a month) it seems much the same. Am I really missing much?
It’s good to be connected but do we really need to be hyper-connected? WU works for me. It’s a nice once-a-day habit to have.
Almost tv-free here — the only show I watch live is Agents of Shield. (And okay, Downton Abbey.) Everything else is a DVD — and I’ve just gotten hooked on The Newsroom and am dragging it out for as long as possible.
I resisted FB for a long time, and when I finally signed up, it was a really nice way to connect with people. As a freelancer working from home with little kids, I didn’t have a ton of adult interaction during the day. But now those kids are grown, my business has expanded, and I think I need to cut back on the ‘virtual’ connections and work more on the real life ones.
(And WU is a lovely habit to form.)