I’ve been thinking we should start a blog. We could do one that focuses on craft and the business with an occasional review, something that’s smart ass. I have so much snark building up, and only you to share it with. We could call it “Snark Byte”. Catchy, no? Whaddya think?
I, being the good girl (koff), felt nervous over snark [even though she can be the snarkiest person I know. You guys have no idea what you’re missing –Kath][I will admit nothing –Teri]. I wrote back:
Maybe our blog could be tip oriented–something readers could come to for a hit. Rodale Press (Prevention magazine, Men’s Health) has always had their finger on a winning pulse: Don’t give the consumers information, tell them what to do with it. It’s the difference between being in the health info business and being in the health idea business. Maybe that distinction is what we need to think about?
Kath liked this idea: Be empowering.
As far as I know, no one is doing this at the moment, so this could carve out the niche we need. Yes, I like this very much….
In January, we set up a blog, and named it Writer Unboxed because Idea Warehouse, which was the idea we’d batted around, had already been claimed. (In retrospect, phew.)
It was just the two of us back then, on a Blogger platform that drove us crazy with time-outs. We posted M-F, talking up craft issues, like hooks, and interviewing authors we admire, like Audrey Niffenegger. Kath and I loved the idea of a group blog, sharing fresh lessons and a diversity of experiences, and so we began to add contributors in 2007. Today, we have 13 esteemed monthly contributors, and 8 equally wonderful, not-yet-published, honorary contributors, not to mention a wide range of talented guests.
We’re grateful to have made several prestigious Best Site for Writers’ lists, and to have had over 1 million visitors. We’re especially thankful to all of you for being a part of the WU community–for helping to make this a respected and well-viewed site on the ‘net.
To celebrate our anniversary, and to show our appreciation, Kath and I have created a Writer Unboxed Facebook page. (Crickets.) We’ve also decided to run a new contest. (Cheers!)
What sort of contest?
The best sort, of course–an
Original Analogy Contest!
We ran this contest here in 2009 and cried our way through the submissions. As we love to laugh, and though it may not be original of us, we’re doing it again.
Some of our favorites from 2009:
1. He stared at his cubicle wall, gray as an elephant’s butt and equally crushing.
2. He considered pants with the same regard that drivers on the autobahn considered brakes; they were optional.
3. Eldon’s writing was somewhat reminiscent of Chaucer’s in that it had to be read numerous times to be completely understood. One major difference: His spelling was not quite as good.
4. He turned her on like a radio, until she realized the tuner was stuck on conservative talk radio. 24/7. Without commercial interruption. Siriusly.
5. When Michael kissed her, Joanna recoiled, much the way one’s bare foot does when it encounters a fresh hairball on the carpet in the middle of the night.
6. Her attempts to help were as misguided as vending-machine sushi, and as likely to succeed as tuna marmalade.
7. I hid my shame inside my confidence, like shredded chicken inside a tamale, but then when I met Lance all my feelings were wrapped inside another layer of feeling, which was lust, so then with one stuffed inside another inside another I was more like a walking turducken, only then I’m not sure where the corn husk fits in anymore and besides, turduckens can’t walk.
8. Simone felt as useless as a Girls Gone Wild video in a gay man’s DVD collection.
9. She was beautiful and mysterious like the Mona Lisa, only she wasn’t smiling, or wearing an old fashioned dress and she had better hair.
10. Dana gazed at Mike, her eyes filling with tears as she realized their love was as doomed as a myopic possum crossing the freeway.
11. Even confession couldn’t clear her conscience. After spilling her secrets and being absolved by the parish priest, her soul still felt partially dirty, like one of those low flow toilets that doesn’t flush all the way.
Think you can do better? Here’s your chance.
What will I win?
* a Kindle (worth $139)
* a Nook (worth $149)
* a bundle of our best-loved craft books, including Writing the Breakout Novel book and workbook, Self-Editing for Fiction Writers, Save the Cat, A Dash of Style, Forest for the Trees, War of Art, On Writing, and Stein on Writing, shipped to you from the outlet of our choice. [Doin’ a jiggy dance yet?–Kath]
How do I enter?
Type your original, never-before-seen-by-human-eyes analogy in the comment area of THIS post. Though we can’t crown a winner outside of the continental US –sorry, shipping can be steep–we encourage everyone who’d like to play to play. [You can’t put a price on bragging rights. Just saying — Kath yet again]
Submit repeatedly as inspiration strikes. You can continue subbing through Friday, January 28th, midnight EST.
Who picks the winner?
Kath and I will choose the top 10 analogies, and put them up on the blog. Then WU readers will vote on a winner.
Yes. Aim for hilarity and elegance of prose. And enter often.
Thanks again for all of your support for Writer Unboxed, for Kath and me, and for our contributors. Thanks for making this a community site we’re proud to call home. Good luck, and write on!
(We really do have a spanky new Facebook page. Come on over and like us!)