For the past five years I’ve joked about “my stalker” – the passionate fan who began following me when he was fourteen, telling me that Just In Case changed his life.
You, in other words.
Your early emails talked about a girlfriend (who never really existed) and were breezy and cheerful, but the truth soon began to emerge.
You were a self-harmer. You attempted suicide on numerous occasions. You were bullied at school. You lived with domestic violence. You were so ugly you could barely leave the house (a lie – you were rather beautiful). You despised himself. And had a secret so terrible, you could never tell anyone.
We talked a little about your secret. We talked a little about everything. I tend not to get too involved with people who email me; there aren’t enough hours in the day, for one thing, and for another, they usually disappear after a brief exchange.
But you didn’t disappear. And there was something about you. [Read more…]