Writer Unboxed

You know how you start Googling something and you end up in a completely different place on the Intertubes than where you originally wanted to go?

I don’t know how I landed HERE, but I’ve just spent a delightful afternoon reading What if the Lord of the Rings was written by Someone Else? (I gotta talk to Therese about having a contest like this!). Shalmanese had me spitting up coffee with this offering:

What if LOTR was written by . . . . JK Rowling?

Frodo crept down the stairs of the of the castle, his invisible cloak sweeping around his legs. He simply had to get the ring into Professor Saurons office without attracting attention. The castle was quiet and he made his way without difficulty. A faint light was glowing from under the Professors door but nobody appeared to be in the office. Sneaking in quietly, he saw the volcano on the ledge bubbling quietly. He was just about to throw this ring into the fiery chasm when the door burst open and the Professor strode in. Not having time to think, Frodo Potter froze on the spot, grateful for being invisible.

It’s really worth finding the Stephen King version in the 41 threads.

In actual, useful writerly news . . .
The Third Reader is a new “online literary journal that presents fiction and poetry of the highest caliber.” They are open for submissions:

We are currently accepting submissions for our premiere issue, which is scheduled for publication in May 2008. In the future we plan to have a variety of themed issues, as well as contests.

This is a brand-new journal, but it could be just the home for that poem or short story currently sitting on your hard drive with no place to go.

Writer’s Digest is holding their 77th annual contest in the following categories:

• Inspirational Writing (Spiritual/Religious)
• Memoirs/Personal Essay
• Magazine Feature Article
• Genre Short Story (Mystery, Romance, etc.)
• Mainstream/Literary Short Story
• Rhyming Poetry
• Non-rhyming Poetry
• Stage Play (* submission by mail only)
• Television/Movie Script (* submission by mail only)
• Children’s/Young Adult Fiction

Click the link for submission guidelines.

For Bulwar-Litton fans, you’ve got 30 days until this year’s “official” deadline (April 15) for the mutha of all literary contests. However, they will grant an extension to June 30 for the “actual” deadline. The 2007 winners never fail to leave me laughing.

ETA:  more Tolkien lunacy HERE on the Tolkien Crackpot Theories page.

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