So it really was a hoax after all (thanks, InkyGirl!). Still, there was enough plausibility in the manifesto to make any writer cringe:

The Happy Endings Foundation believes that children’s books should only have happy endings. It urges parents to buy positive books for their children.

THEF was originally founded in 2000 by Adrienne Small after she read the first book in A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket to her daughter. As well as making her feel thoroughly miserable, Mrs Small noticed her daughter seemed to take a more negative approach to life. Sadly, this situation worsened substantially, as her daughter subsequently read all 13 books in the series.

Mrs Small has now left her career as a tax inspector to focus on THEF full-time. She plans to rewrite all 13 Lemony Snicket books to give them happy endings. Her versions will be published on-line – watch this website!

Members of THEF committee will also be making audio versions of the books available as downloads so children will be able to listen to them on their MP3 players.

AT THE HAPPY ENDINGS FOUNDATION OUR AIMS ARE

  • To eradicate sad thoughts from all literature
  • To make people smile a little more often
  • To encourage authors to write more uplifting books for children
  • To highlight the dangers of reading sad books
  • To unite parents of a similar thinking and create a force with which to be reckoned
  • To protect the next generation of readers.
  • And, above all, to ensure the longevity of HAPPY ENDINGS (that means “to make sure happy endings are around for a long time”)

Since last week was Banned Books week, one couldn’t help being taken in by this clever marketing ploy to buy, well, a banned book (in this case, a Lemony Snicket book).

As a parent, I really don’t want my kid reading evil hate-filled books. She has enough trouble sleeping at night as it is. But I’m cognizent of the fact that people have the right to write and read evil hate-filled books. And that evil hate-filled books serve a purpose in a wider sense: for good or bad they are part of a literary discourse. We are lucky to be able to exercise the freedom to read them. Or not.

It’s really sad that people feel the need to ban books, especially for children. I’d rather have a discussion with my child about a book’s merits or lack thereof, than a discussion about intellectual fascism when she’s a teenager.

Kathleen Bolton is co-founder of Writer Unboxed. She has written two novels under the pseudonym Cassidy Calloway: Confessions of a First Daughter, and Secrets of a First Daughter--both books in a YA series about the misadventures of the U.S. President's teen-aged daughter, published by HarperCollins.
Kathleen Bolton
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